I'm sure you've heard a million times in your life that "life has no rewind button" and while that may be true, it doesn't mean you can't hit a nice little pretend pause button and reflect on how you got the point you are at and back up a little. You can't take back things you've said or done but you might be able to back up to them and find some solutions that will either prevent them from happening again or right some of the damage caused.
There are a few inspirations behind this particular post. One being personal in my own life. I've realized I'm becoming more and more like the person I was before I went through a dramatic overhaul a few years back and that person is not a pleasant one. Can I change the way I've acted and things I have done? Nope. But I can back up! You can too. For humor's sake I'll clue you in to the other two inspirations behind me writing this post and I'm sure it will confirm your suspicions that I'm certifiably crazy: The TV show My Name is Earl and a line from a country song that states, "I'm living in fast forward... I need to rewind real slow."
Okay, now that the giggles are all out, I want to share some steps you can take (with me!) to back up.
1. Hit that nice little pretend pause button. Essentially, put yourself in time-out. Come on, especially you moms out there, you know the purpose of this is not so much as punishment but for reflection. Think about where you are, how you got there, what you have done and IF you are ready to back up and do some fixin'.
2. Once you've had a couple good "aha!" moments, start making a list. Yes, one of those lists. It can be on paper, in your phone, on your computer and it can be however it works for you but get these things out of your mental to-do list and on hard copy. It's just more "for real-real" that way. If you've hurt people, write their names down and what you've done. If you've become strapped in debt, write what you owe down. Get it all in front of you in black and white (or purple in pink if that's how you roll. Ain't no shame in using crayons for this!)
3. Find solutions. Look at what needs to be righted, what needs to be left alone, what's fixable and what isn't. Then put it in action. Ask for forgiveness only if you are genuinely sorry. If you ain't sorry you might need to back up to step 1 again. Find ways to make debts more manageable. Find time to work on your emotional health.
4. REMIND YOURSELF not to "go there" again. I mean, chances are, you will. We're all human and we fail daily. Buncha losers we can be. However, be it a poster, a picture, a daily alarm or even an accountability partner it is just so much easier to stay on track when you've got something reminding you daily to make the right choices.
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